Dear boys, the state of our union is strong

Dear boys,

Just this week, the President of the United States gave his annual address. Traveling by motorcade to the Capitol, he addressed both houses of Congress and the nation at large in the State of the Union speech. In the speech, he laid out his list of accomplishments, spoke of his goals for the future, and highlighted ordinary Americans who’ve done extraordinary things. It was heartwarming, inspiring, and emotional.

When the men’s hockey team descended into the historic chamber, necks festooned with Olympic gold, it was a moment for the ages. American skill, grit, and determination had triumphed over our neighbors to the north, and a single, gap-toothed smile displayed the cost.

Then two soldiers stood. One, a 100-year-old veteran named Royce Williams, was given the Medal of Honor. He was slow to rise on his shaky legs, but rise he did, and he received the medal proudly.

Next, a much younger soldier stood. Clinging to a walker, he rose on wounded legs to receive his own Medal of Honor as his proud wife stood beaming at his side. In a hail of gunfire, this helicopter pilot kept his head and flew his machine with precision. With Eric Slover’s unbreakable spirit and professionalism, he completed the mission successfully, and those damaged legs told the cost.

It is good, boys, to take stock regularly. To look back over our lives and note where we’ve succeeded and where we have failed. It is healthy to assess where we’re at and where we want to go. In that light, guys, I want to tell you that for your dad and I, the state of our union is strong.

Thanks to your little brother’s late arrival (for which one of you prayed), Dad and I have not yet had an empty nest. That’s about to change. After 36 years of being parents and having one or more of you at home, we will finally be alone. While some can blithely say, “We can’t wait,” that isn’t us. We have enjoyed raising you more than we can ever say, and we know it will be a big adjustment.

Chapter endings can be so hard, but I want you to know that we will be okay. We will figure it out because (and it’s important for you to know this) we still really like each other. Everything we do, we do together. Unlike the strife and division in the national conversation, there is unity in our home. Not perfection, for there never can be that, but unity. This is always possible.

I recall what you’d say after being at friends’ houses. “Mom, they yell at each other a lot.” It’s certainly not that your father and I always agreed, but the fact that you noticed the yelling told me that it was a new experience for you. I am thankful for that.

Now that you’re all grown, it delights us that you call home frequently. “What’s happening? Anything new?” you all will say, and then you give us your updates.

Often, you call for advice. “What do you think?” you’ll ask, and so we dig into our storehouse of wisdom for the particular nugget that you need. How thankful I am for the lessons learned through adversity. I’m thankful we never gave up, but kept plowing forward, eager to learn from life’s curveballs. Life is so much harder when you’re navigating it alone, and I’m thrilled that Dad and I have something to give when you need it.

We don’t plan to stop growing either, boys. One of the greatest gifts we ever gave you was a willingness to work on ourselves. I hope you have learned from that example. If you continue to grow, your lives will become richer than you could imagine. Never stop, for your own children will need that same lesson. Believe me, Dad and I care very much about your future children.

As you start your own families, remember that you are raising someone else’s parents. Like I said, we care so much about your as-yet unborn children, and we want them to have the best parents they can possibly have. This is why your characters matter and why your own personal growth is of critical importance. You are seeking wives, and those women will be the mothers of the next generation. Choose wisely, sons.

Your father and I are highly gratified when we see your lives of faith and integrity. Much of this is in spite of us, and we are thankful. Funny, how different four people can be, raised under the same roof. Wonderful, how different four people can be, raised under the same roof. Such colorful personalities you have, such different callings, such different industries, and all across the land. It is breathtaking to see.

You are going places that we cannot go, doing things that we cannot do, and all of it is good. It’s so good. This is what you are meant for—to go out and do the things that are in your hearts to do.

Meanwhile, your dad and I will keep the home fires burning. We pray for you regularly, together, and I know that means a great deal to you. It is our privilege.

Yes, the state of our union is strong. Now it’s up to you to keep moving forward, keep trusting in God, and keep on standing up, keep rising, no matter what adversity comes your way. You can. Dad and I have your backs.

Signed this day, February 28th, in the year of our Lord 2026,

Mother