I may not be Bartholomew, but I think I’ve got his hats

I didn’t know when I said “I do” that what I was really saying was, “From here on out and forever more, I am no longer just a cheerful, carefree maiden who sells notions.  At any given moment, I will be a wife, a mother, a nursemaid, a cheerleader, a cook, a housemaid, a teacher, a preacher, a storyteller, a laundress, and a gooser-in-chief of poky, reluctant scholars.”

And that was just the tip of the hat pile.

Yesterday morning, sorting through the proverbial “hat stack,” I snatched up the one labeled “columnist,” threw my backpack over my shoulder, and headed for the door.  Stopping for a moment, I pulled out the cap titled “exhorter” and said to my sons, They of the Flashing Molars, “Boys, look for someone that you can bless today.”

Just that quick, it came.  “Then I’ll kiss a girl.”  This from Kid Kaboom (who else?).  And ‘just that quick,’ “exhorter” became “relisher of teenage humor,” and I laughed out loud.  I repeated it to his father who also laughed out loud, then shared it with a grandma.  Who – well, you know.

Bending over to kiss him there, all sleepy and hunkered in front of the heater, I said, “It’s really warm here.  Stinky pits when giving a kiss may not be much of a blessing…”  And laughed again.

Column finished, I picked up Little and we trundled home.  Where I grabbed another hat (“teacher”) and watched as he labored over his letters, shaky ‘Js’ and ‘Us’ and several beautiful ‘Rs’ forming beneath his tiny hand.  Then, at my instruction, he trotted off to brush his teeth and make his bed, pillow tucked carefully on the end.

“Transcriptionist” came next, followed by “cook,” “wrangler of kiddos,” and “washer of dishes,” finally herding them out the door for their evening classes just in time for The Mister to sneak in like a chicken poacher, carrying two fresh subs.  Which is how we came to enjoy a celebratory, quiet dinner together.

Speaking of celebrating, I’m doing exactly that today.  For I’ve just acquired a brand-new hat for my collection, that of “editor.”  Now, in addition to contributing regularly to the beautiful, brand-new magazine, “Cooking & Such,” I am joining Sherry (Editor-in-Chief) and her staff as an editor, a title I’m honored to wear.

If you’ll excuse me now, I have to change hats.  For a few sweet moments, I’m going to be “pom-pom girl” and turn some cartwheels. After which, of course, I’ll return to my most sedate, demure self with the proper lady-like hat.

Uh-huh.